These Are the Thoughts and Phrases That Enable You To Be the Worst Kind of You There Is.
For all posts related to Corporate American Horror Story, I want to make it very clearly known and understood that I am not some anarchist whose anti-establishment, or someone who wants to teach people to "overthrow the system". Instead, I want people to become more self-aware of the things they become as do just that: "become part of the system". I can speak to any hiring manager and can hear them say that one of the biggest things they're looking for in potential candidates is someone who is a free thinker. Someone who isn't going to wait to be told what to do, but instead take the reigns and take action.
Independent thinkers, though, are always a double-edged sword, but it really comes down to a number of factors that have nothing to do with this post. So, instead, we'll focus on thoughts and mindsets, and work to break ourselves out of the habitual ways of thinking that stifle us, and put us on the conveyor belt of thoughts. For anyone thinking of becoming an entrepreneur, or small business owner, this is increasingly important because you are building your system. Without the right mindset, you're probably not building anything worthwhile.
Thoughts are extremely important. Just as the famous Henry Ford quote goes, "Whether you think you can or you can't, you're right." The other day, I wrote on one sheet of paper the word, "manifest". You might remember (or revisit) that in previous posts, I've talked so much about being able to see your final project and more importantly knowing that you're capable. That's so important. So, when I wrote down "manifest" I did so because to me that is always my first and foremost goal.
The goal is always to "be able", capable of bringing your thoughts into ideas, then into goals and plans, and then a final project. Without the right state of mind to do so, you're probably going to fall flat. But of course, for working folks, your mind is everywhere sometimes. There's so much going on, so rather than piling new thoughts on top, I've decided to think about phrases that we say so often, and explain why they can be problematic for so many of us. Ready? Let's go!
Below are some of the most highly toxic phrases and thoughts we say aloud or tell ourselves and the outcomes they have on our productivity, creativity, and outputs.
1. I'd Love To Start My Own Business
One of the biggest misconceptions of anyone interested in entrepreneurship is that it's a sweet life; from coffee dates, to posting about "boss life" on Instagram, people imagine the independence to be enticing, and that couldn't be more wrong. Most importantly, though, starting a business isn't about wanting to, but instead solving a practical problem with a unique and practical solution. Beware of quick sand.
2. I Don't Have the Time
"I don't have time" is usually a difficult concept to explain because people truly believe they are 100% booked up, when the issues may just be in one's daily schedule. If I didn't have time, I would simply evaluate what I was putting my time into so I can figure out what needs to change. "I don't have time" is a buffer phrase that indicates poor time management, and no effort to change.
3. You Are 'Goals'
Please, spare me. I get a maximum of 2 and a half hours of sleep, am addicted to coffee, just ran out of space in my "thought pad", and have bills galore. Do not fake envy this lifestyle...just please.
4. I Wish I was Talented
I've had someone tell me this before, and I couldn't feel more uncomfortable. Primarily because I not only believe we all have talents, but because people believe that talent - not hardwork - is the keys to success. Never forget that Tom Brady ran a 5.2 in his 40-yard dash and was drafted #199th in the NFL draft. He now has 5 Super Bowl rings.
5. I Could Probably Do Way Better Than That
Nothing is worse than someone who is all talk, and no action. If you can outdo me, you would have outdone me.
6. I am an aspiring...
The Great Jedi Master Yoda once said: "Do or do not, there is no try."
7. But It's The Weekend
And time waits for no man. The weekend presents just the perfect opportunity to take advantage of a full day's worth of work, creativity, and time that belongs to you and only you. Weekend's are fun, but if you ask anyone, they hardly take weekend's "off". Time waits for no one.
8. I Prefer To Work Alone
You also said networking was important so, which is it?
9. When I Launch My...
I can add an asterisk to this one. It's split 50-50 between two different times I've heard this phrase before. One instance has been the person who is waiting. Everything is about when they finally decide to leap, and eventually you learn the leap just hasn't happened as of yet. What are you waiting for? The second instance is someone who is in fact under construction, working on things, and probably going to really get things going. Becareful not to be both, or the first.
10. If I were to _______, would you support me?
Sadly, this is the introductory chapter of Vanity Metrics 101. People will like this status, tell you yes, promise you money for investments, and "support" (don't get me started on this word). The truth is, verbal affirmation just doesn't have the same effect as financial application. If you need this much of a boost to get things going, I would tread very lightly. No one should seek this level of validation because one day, it may never be there.
11. I'm Tired
Replace this phrase with "I need to step away for a bit", or "I think I've overworked". What I've found in my own personal experiences is that I'm tired Monday through Friday, but Friday night I have enough juice in the tank for 8 rounds of drinks at happy hour, bar hopping, and a good jook and shuffle. Was I actually tired? No. Neither are you.
12. I'm hoping to quit my job, and become independent next year
Keep your job. Refer back to #1.
13. I move in silence
Imagine silence telling you that it's silence. If you're telling me you move in silence, you're going to have to disclose what part of your operations you're keeping silent, which unfortunately is not silence. You wanted me to ask, and that's a bit frustrating because most people don't care to begin with. Also, moving in silence may harm your brand. We live in an age of exposure, visibility, and disruption. Do not be surprised when you begin to realize people don't actually know what you actually do. At a certain level, it's best to pronounce that "G", especially for small businesses and entrepreneurs.
14. I'm Waiting Until I Launch
We are, too. Now hurry up.
15. I have to be up in the morning
Monday's work doesn't care about Tuesday's wake.
16. It's A Week Night
I hear this often. I never know how to react to it. I never know how to actually speak to why the thinking is toxic, other than to refer to the idea of time. When is it appropriate to put extra time in? In college, we studied at night - even pulling all-nighters. I'm not sure what's the difference between Wednesday night and Saturday night, especially since most people take the weekends off.
17. You Should...
"You should" is a toxic phrase for any creative, entrepreneur, or side-hustler to hear. It typically comes from someone who doesn't fully understand what you do, or have done, and is the precursor to advice that will either frustrate you, or isn't aligned with what you're looking to do. For me, people who gave me "you should" phrases always provided advice and evidence that didn't make sense from a marketing, branding, or practical position. In addition, "you should" makes light of the situation, as though the idea was just that simple to grasp and achieve. "You should get an app". "You should invest in a studio space". Whatever it is that you think I should do, why not join my team and help me achieve it. Unpaid, unsolicited consultants are toxic, and should be avoided. Help people around you to understand the differences between, "If I may recommend" or on the interrogative, "Have you considered".
On the journey to success, all you have is your work, your thoughts, and your outcomes. These are the three most important things that you have to keep aligned. Thoughts like these above will keep you at a constant misalignment. Keep people who think and speak like this away from you, and more importantly away from your work, and I guarantee you clearer thinking will direct you to better outcomes. Find me on social media for alternatives statements and thoughts! Subscribe for more from our Corporate American Horror Story series.
2 Comments
9/18/2017 10:30:33 am
#13 is my favorite! I was always wondering about making silent moves... Now I know to just let it be known!!!
Reply
Mistah Marvel
9/18/2017 07:04:33 pm
Yes! Let it be known! Moving in silence for what? To be forgotten, or so people really don't know what you do? Nope.
Reply
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